Understanding Self-Awareness in Autistic Children Through SEL

What 'Self-Awareness' Looks Like in Autistic Kids (and What It Doesn't)

In the journey of self-awareness, autistic children often tread a path that defies traditional expectations. Unlike their neurotypical peers, whose self-awareness might manifest through clear articulation of feelings and thoughts, autistic children may express this through unique behaviors or interests. Self-awareness in autistic kids often includes a heightened sensitivity to specific sensory inputs or a deep connection to particular interests.

Instead of focusing on what is traditionally considered "missing," it's crucial to recognize these expressions as valuable forms of self-awareness. They can reveal insights into how autistic children perceive their world and their place within it. This article is part of our complete guide to Self-Awareness in Kids: A Parent's Guide (Ages 2-12).

A Real-Life Example

Consider Alex, a 7-year-old autistic child who expresses joy through humming a particular tune whenever he's happy. This behavior isn't just a random quirk; it's Alex's way of connecting with his emotions and signaling his mood to others. Recognizing these unique expressions as valid forms of self-awareness is essential for supporting autistic children in their developmental journey.

In my practice, I've observed how children like Alex flourish when their unique ways of expressing emotions are acknowledged and encouraged. This practice helps them build confidence and enhances their understanding of self-awareness, which is a cornerstone of social-emotional learning (SEL).

Interoception + Alexithymia — What the Research Actually Says

Interoception, the ability to perceive internal body states, is often different in autistic individuals. Research by Garfinkel et al. highlights that discrepancies in interoception might contribute to the challenges autistic individuals face in identifying and expressing emotions ³. Alexithymia, the difficulty in identifying and describing emotions, is also more prevalent in autistic populations, complicating the journey to self-awareness.

This understanding transforms how we support autistic children. Instead of assuming a lack of emotional depth, we can appreciate these children’s unique ways of experiencing emotions. Supporting interoception involves helping children recognize bodily signals such as hunger, warmth, or anxiety, which can be a foundation for emotional awareness and regulation.

Understanding Interoception: An Infographic

Why Traditional Emotion Charts Often Fail (and What to Use Instead)

Emotion charts are a common tool used to help children identify and express their feelings. However, for many autistic children, these charts can be ineffective. They often rely on facial expressions or abstract concepts that might not resonate with an autistic child's way of processing emotions.

Suggested Alternatives

• Use concrete examples: Instead of abstract facial expressions, use scenarios that describe what each feeling might "feel like" physically.
• Incorporate special interests: Utilize characters or themes from special interests to help explain emotions.

Imagine employing a social story that features Thomas from "Thomas Explores Insects at School - Social Story PDF" to convey emotions through scenarios within his adventures.

In my practice, I've seen many parents initially struggle with traditional emotion charts. By shifting to more personalized tools, aligned with their child’s interests, they noted significant improvements in their child’s ability to express emotions, which is a critical aspect of SEL.

Special Interests as a Self-Awareness On-Ramp

Special interests, often seen as intense focus areas, provide a valuable avenue for developing self-awareness. They can offer comfort and a sense of identity, enabling children to express themselves more freely.

For example, if a child loves dinosaurs, you might use this interest to explore emotions by asking, "How does a dinosaur feel when it's happy or scared?" This method can help children articulate their feelings in a context they understand and enjoy.

Encouraging Expression Through Special Interests

• Create themed stories: Develop stories around their interests to explore various emotions.
• Use role-play: Act out scenarios involving their interests to discuss feelings.

When Autistic Kids 'Mask' — and Why It Costs Them

Masking refers to the practice of hiding one's true self to fit in. For autistic children, this can mean suppressing stims or mimicking neurotypical behaviors to avoid standing out. While it might facilitate social acceptance in the short term, masking can lead to stress and burnout.

In my practice, I've worked with children who were exhausted from constant masking, leading to meltdowns at home. Supporting a child's authentic self, rather than encouraging masking, is crucial for their emotional well-being. Emphasizing the importance of being true to oneself can help reduce the pressure to conform and allow children to develop genuine self-awareness.

Recognizing and Reducing Masking

• Observe triggers: Identify situations where your child feels the need to mask.
• Foster safe spaces: Encourage environments where your child can express themselves freely.

Strategies from a Practicing Speech-Language Pathologist (Rajini)

To support self-awareness in autistic children, it's important to adopt strategies that align with their unique strengths:

1. Encourage Sensory Exploration: Allow children to explore different textures, sounds, and movements to help them express and understand their sensory preferences.
2. Develop Personalized Social Stories: Create or utilize stories that incorporate their interests and real-life scenarios. Consider "Thomas's School Meeting Adventure Printable Social Story" for school-related experiences.
3. Use Visual Supports: Incorporate visual schedules or emotion cards linked to favorite interests to help them anticipate and express feelings.

These strategies aim to empower children by respecting their neurological differences and enhancing their self-awareness.

Building a Supportive Environment

• Introduce calming techniques: Teach strategies like deep breathing or sensory breaks.
• Promote choice-making: Encourage children to make choices, enhancing their decision-making skills and self-awareness.

What Progress Actually Looks Like (Not Neurotypical Milestones)

Progress in self-awareness for autistic children doesn't always align with neurotypical milestones. Instead of comparing, focus on personal achievements, such as:

• Recognizing when they are overwhelmed and using a calming strategy.
• Expressing a preference through words or actions.

An In-My-Practice Moment

I once worked with a child who, after months of using social stories, began to independently choose "dragon breaths" during stressful moments, a significant milestone for him.

Understanding that progress is individual and not a race helps parents appreciate the unique journey of their child. It’s these small but significant steps that build a foundation for further development in self-awareness.

References

¹ Baron-Cohen, Leslie, Frith (1985). Does the autistic child have a 'theory of mind'? Cognition 21:37-46 ² Howlin, P. & Magiati, I. (2017). Autism spectrum disorder: outcomes in adulthood. Curr Opin Psychiatry ³ Garfinkel, S. N. et al. (2016). Discrepancies between dimensions of interoception in autism. Biological Psychology 114:117